Mike Gagliano's Stoopid Blog

New Jersey native (via NC & SC) now keeping it real(ish) in the Motor City. You may remember me as "Joe The Policeman" from the 'What's Goin' Down' episode of "That's My Momma." (The views expressed on this page do not necessarily reflect those of WRIF Radio or its parent company, Greater Media, Inc.)
Recent Tweets @MikeGagliano

At a time when popular revolutions are sweeping the globe, the United States should be strengthening, not weakening, basic rules of law and principles of justice.

  • James: Look at these guys.
  • James: The only way to get on this show is if you say yes to these questions: Are you a dick?
  • James: Do you like tight black t-shirts and arm curls?
  • James: Do you like attention?
  • James: Do you have an arm tattoo?
  • James: Why aren't any of these guys talking about fucking her? That's ALL these guys would be talking about without the cameras there.
  • James: Look at these guys. Dick. Dick. Dick. Dick.
  • James: I can't believe this woman put her kid on this show. "My Dad died, and then my Mom went on this whore show twice."
  • James: This guy is totally Will Forte.
  • James: What!? This guy just answered a question with a question.
  • James (valley girl accent): "I'm not feeling butterflies!! I'm just feeling sick that I have to sit with this guy who answers my questions with questions for another 2 hours."
  • James: She's crying because she's a total mess.
  • James: I would hate to get murdered. That would be the fucking worst way to die ever. You'd just be like, "ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL?"
  • James: As if this woman couldn't find a boyfriend without a TV show.
  • James: A beard isn't really complete until you can put elastic bands in it, right? That's how I'll know when mine is done.
  • James: When I was fat a few years ago, in all those pictures, can we just tell people that was your uncle?
  • James: I'm going on The Bachelor. I'm so fucking done with you Kelly. I'm going on the Bachelor to meet one of these hot ladies who knows what they are looking for.
  • James: The only thing Tony can do at this point is whip his pants down.
  • James: I'm going skydiving. Chances of dying are 1:100000, chances of dying in a car 1:4000. I'm going to skydive into the pool. If I died because the chute didn't open, that's a pretty great story for the kids to tell their friends.
  • James: I want a 60 day membership to this BJ's place.
  • James: Look at this douchebag's hair.
  • James: Nice fucking letter, man.
  • James (Imitating Bachelor): "I have a son named Taylor. He's 5 and a totally sweet kid and he will absolutely bone your daughter Ricky."
  • James: Stevie is a PARTY MC??
  • James: Who says 'mincely'? Who the fuck says 'mincely,' come on.
  • James: You can tell that guy got hit in the head.
  • James: As if she's gonna pick the Party MC, she has a kid.
  • James: She picked the Party MC. That's how you know this is buillshit. That's fantastic.
  • James: You're a biology teacher man. You make 20K a year, what is THIS GIRL supposed to do with you, a biology teacher? She already knows where her vagina is.


Cat Flag


Freelancing isn’t free. When a client doesn’t pay, copious amounts of time and money are needed to chase that paycheck. Let’s change that.

TheFreelancer Payment Protection Act
– which would legally protect freelancers from non-paying clients – needs your help.

Over 1,000 freelancers are already a part the campaign. The bill recently pushed through the New York State Assembly and secured key Republican and Democratic sponsors along the way. But we’re not done yet.

Caved yet again. This year’s 3/17 gear. :-)

Caved yet again. This year’s 3/17 gear. :-)


Voter Naptime
Lexington, NC. Feb. 17, 2012

Unlike Ambien, a Joe Biden speech can help you sleep without the risk of sleepwalking into your kitchen and peeing in the refrigerator.

HAHAHA! This is great.


Modern politics is a science. We break it down for you.


still best.


still best.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: The following post was originally written on 20 Feb, and amended on 24 Feb 2012.

This irony is not lost on me:

I’m spending a sunny Presidents’ Day afternoon drinking at the bar, writing this blog, and lamenting the lack of a quality presidential candidate to vote for.

Read More

I don’t like the fact that you sent me a contract; it makes me feel bound to pay you.